"I want my niece's ears pierced" said the loud overbearing woman with the fuzzy white hat.
"Fine, do you have custody of her?" replied the tired overworked sales girl behind the counter.
"What do you need to know that for?! I'm a paying customer! If I want her ears pierced then that's all you need to know!" Fuzzy hat's voice was getting louder - even louder than the disco version of Jingle Bells playing over the store's speaker system.
"Well" sighed the poor sales girl "I need permission from a parent in order to pierce ears on a minor."
All was silent for a moment save for the music in the background.
Jing-jing-jingle bells-wichy-wichy-woo-woo...
"It's a Christmas gift! It's a surprise!" screamed the woman with the fuzzy white hat - the hat looking whiter compared to her reddening complexion. It was a nice contrast.
"How is it a surprise? - If she's right here getting her ears pierced. She's going to know, especially once she feels the needle go through her ear lobe." Sales girl was gaining my admiration. I could sense I wasn't alone - others were quietly watching what would evolve. Mariah Carey had replaced the bad disco Jingle Bells -
"All I want for Christmas is you-oooo-ooh-ohh baaaby...." .
"I BROUGHT MY NIECE HERE TO GET HER EARS PIERCED FOR CHRISTMAS! HOW DARE YOU QUESTION ME...I'M NOT SOMEONE OFF THE STREET!" (Isn't that how she got to the mall - from the street? Just a thought.)
"Sorry Ma'am. I need a parent here to pierce anything. Store policy. It prevents minors from getting things pierced without permission."
"I'M GIVING HER PERMISSION!" the woman yelled. The girl with the un-pierced ears looked like she was backing up away from the crowd. "YOU GET BACK HERE!
Fuzzy hat screeched. Yes...it was actually a screech. Excitement was building here at Clare's Boutique at the Mall, yes indeed.
"You're not the parent. Can we call her mother - maybe that would be okay?" Sales girl was really impressing me. At this point I would've probably just called for the manager-or mall security.
"NO. IT'S GOING TO BE A SURPRISE! I"M A PROFESSIONAL DAMN IT! I'M...I'M A REGISTERED NURSE!!"
And that's when I didn't keep my mouth shut. All I had to do was leave quietly, go to the candle store or sample cheese or something at the Hickory Farms Stand, but no. That would've been too easy.
"If you're a registered nurse, why can't you pierce them yourself?" I asked.
For a moment it was quiet, except of course for the end of Mariah's song. I've heard Mariah has a five octave range. Fuzzy Hat seemed to be able to hit six.
"COME ON!" The Aunt grabbed her poor niece by the arm and roughly steered her out of the store. There was a bit of applause and people saying "Yeah!" and "I hope I don't end up in her hospital!" I checked out my items and the sales staff asked me if I'd like a complimentary light-up feather pen. I said thanks anyway, but I already had so many feather light-up pens already.
Nobody questioned this.
After this I went to the bookstore. Nothing like this happens at the bookstore.
Happy Shopping! There's 15 more shopping days left until Christmas - enjoy the carnage!
cranky shopper photo courtesy of 123rf royalty free photos.
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